Another Thought About When Bad Days Strike

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=56656&picture=princess-lying-flat-on-roof
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=56656&picture=princess-lying-flat-on-roof

In yesterday’s post, we talked about things you can say to yourself when you’re in the midst of a bad day (click here to be taken to that post).

Today I want to talk about another thing to say.

When my daughter was young, it seemed as if the world was a very dangerous place. There were wars and conflicts and “police actions” everywhere, it seemed. Taxes were high, prices were going up, and it looked as if new diseases were popping up daily.

I remember walking out to the mailbox one day and I was uptight and on edge because of worries about the state of the world and feeling anxious and inadequate protecting my daughter from all the “bad stuff” that was out there.

Standing in front of the mailbox. I had a moment of astounding clarity. In that moment, I realized I was okay. My daughter was okay–better than okay, actually! My family was okay, too.

That day happened to be a beautiful spring day and I remember feeling the warmth of the sun on my shoulders and hearing the birds chirping. It occurred to me that if the world was that terrible of a place, the flowers wouldn’t be blooming, and the air wouldn’t be springtime-fresh.

In that moment, I knew all was well.

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:L%C3%A9on_Perrault,_1894_-_Mother_with_Child.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:L%C3%A9on_Perrault,_1894_-_Mother_with_Child.jpg

Over the years I’ve returned to the saying “all is well” over and over again because it’s usually true. From one moment to the next, all really is well–even in spite of issues that I may have to deal with. Any perceived unpleasantness is usually in the future, not in the moment. And if it is unpleasant in that particular moment, it does not last forever and very soon, I can go back to saying in each moment that all is well.

Action Plan: along with the other mirror work you’re doing that was mentioned in yesterday’s post (click here to be taken to that post), add in the statement “All is well.”

During your day, remind yourself of this fact–especially when you find your thoughts veering off the road into the ditch of negative thinking. Pull them back by reminding yourself that right now, right here, in this moment, all is well.

Let me know how saying “All is well” works for you in the comment section below. If you’ve come up with tweaks that make it work better for you, feel free to share those in the comments below as well. Thanks for sharing!

You’re awesome!

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

 

When Bad Days Strike

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mr_Pipo_Think_03.svg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mr_Pipo_Think_03.svg

The most important thing to do when bad days strike is to keep control of your mind.

Do NOT let negative, worrying, angry, or demoralized thinking move in and set up camp.

It’s natural to have these types of thoughts pop into your mind, but don’t let them stay!

Talk to yourself with positive and hopeful words and phrases. Stand in front of the mirror as you do this. Smile and be upbeat.

Say things like:

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mr_Pipo_WIN.svg
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mr_Pipo_WIN.svg

I can do this. I can take things one step at a time and work my way through this. I know I can! I may not have all the answers right now but I have answers enough to take the next step. I know that as I keep moving forward and doing everything I can each day, the answers will come to me as I need them.

Another thing to say to yourself in front of the mirror is:

Nothing lasts forever and this, too, shall pass. This is just temporary. I can hurry it along by taking the next logical step and the next one after that. As I keep doing this, soon I’ll see brighter days.

It may seem silly to talk to yourself like this but it’s vitally important that you do. It’s important that you stop those negative thoughts and turn them to something more helpful–and to do it as quickly as possible.

Give it a try and let me know in the comments section how it worked out for you.

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

 

When Getting Advice From an Expert, Follow It!

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=148532&picture=background-wallpaper
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=148532&picture=background-wallpaper

 

As I was thinking of yesterday’s post about putting in the effort (click here to be taken to it), my thoughts wandered to a business networking group that I had belonged to years ago.

We met every other week for breakfast to discuss local business trends as well as to support and advise one another regarding questions or concerns we may have had about our own businesses.

One evening, we were to attend a lecture, hosted by the local chamber of commerce, featuring a speaker who was a successful businessman and a legend in the region. The best part  was that, before the lecture, our group went to dinner with him because one of our members was a good friend of his.

Needless to say, all of us were excited and grateful for our good fortune!

We had a lively and informative dinner with the speaker, although one of our group shifted the focus to her and her struggling gift shop. Even though he generously tailored his comments, suggestions, and guidance to her, all of us were able to extrapolate useful information that we could immediately apply to our particular businesses.

https://pixabay.com/en/man-silhouette-pear-light-idea-814697/
https://pixabay.com/en/man-silhouette-pear-light-idea-814697/

The businessman’s lecture afterward at the Chamber of Commerce was fantastic. He packed it full of useful information, including tips designed to help business people work more effectively, which then would translate into increased sales.  All of the attendees were thrilled with his presentation and, to this day, I still use the suggestions he gave us!

I noticed, though, that the gift shop owner seemed a little down-in-the-dumps. I was surprised because I figured she’d be hopeful, at the very least, with the one-on-one consultation she had with the businessman at dinner plus the additional information we got from the lecture.  I chalked it off, though, figuring she was tired after a long day.

The next morning, our group met for breakfast. As expected, everyone was still excited after the dinner and lecture the night before.  One of the members told us he couldn’t sleep that night because he was buzzing with ideas.

The gift shop owner was silent. Another businesswoman remarked that the gift shop owner must be eager to get to her store so she could apply the excellent suggestions the businessman had given her.

She turned to her and said there was nothing to apply because the businessman didn’t give her anything she could use. She went on to say that he didn’t understand her particular business, he didn’t know what he was talking about, and his success was probably a result of dumb luck.

We were stunned. Speechless.

Are you surprised to learn that she went out of business a year or so later?

As I think back to that evening and the following morning, I’m still astounded at the gift shop owner’s dismissive attitude. She was the one who sought out the businessman’s advice, yet she rejected every single one of his suggestions.

It’s a cautionary tale for the rest of us.

When WE seek advice from experts, we should at least try a few of their suggestions.  After all, we asked them for guidance because their success means they’re doing something right; we should heed what they’re saying!

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:First_step_to_success_know_yourself_and_be_stable_2014-02-20_00-50.jpeg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:First_step_to_success_know_yourself_and_be_stable_2014-02-20_00-50.jpeg

Action Plan: Think about advice and guidance you’ve received over the years.  Is there any of it that you didn’t use because you thought it didn’t apply to you?  Take a thorough look at it and figure out ways to incorporate it now.

I believe in you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

What I’ve Learned: You Gotta Be Willing to Put Forth the Effort

https://pixabay.com/en/eggs-four-food-breakfast-basket-17987/
https://pixabay.com/en/eggs-four-food-breakfast-basket-17987/

As you know, I’m trying to get Yes I Can Pep Talks onto its feet. In the US, we have an organization called SCORE, which stands for Service Corps of Retired Executives. They are comprised of retired business people from all types of business and their mission is to mentor other business owners and aspiring business owners.

Also, by asking around, you can probably find groups of business people, and other like-minded individuals, who meet on a regular basis and offer support, guidance, and encouragement to one another.

I discovered SCORE midway through last year when my local library hosted a few of their seminars. It didn’t occur to me until the end of last year to contact them about mentorship. I signed up and have been meeting with them since January.

When SCORE told me they had found mentors who were knowledgeable and had expertise in the area of my business, I was ecstatic.

But,

…then they told me the mentors were an hour and a half’s drive away.

At first I thought: Darn. That’s going to be really tough to fit that into my schedule because I’ll have to give up the better part of a day.

I hoped they could help me through email correspondence, which SCORE indicated was one of the methods of mentorship. I resigned myself to that, knowing that it would be great and very helpful but also knowing it would be the same as in-person mentoring.

But then I thought: How short-sighted am I?? This is a golden opportunity and it’s handed to me on a silver platter. I’m being ridiculous for not immediately jumping at it and then moving heaven and earth to make it happen!!

I’m glad to report that I have been meeting with my mentors each month regardless of the difficulty–except when we had an ice storm and it was too dangerous to drive.

You have to be willing to put forth the effort, no matter what, to make your dreams come true. Yes, it will be hard; yes, it will be inconvenient; yes, you’ll have to make difficult choices. But the payoff–the payoff of moving closer and closer to your dreams–is well worth the time and effort!

https://pixabay.com/en/easter-holidays-chick-egg-spring-1217254/
https://pixabay.com/en/easter-holidays-chick-egg-spring-1217254/

Action Plan: Take a look at what you aren’t committing wholeheartedly to. What are you holding back on and not going “all in” on?

Even though the experts and folk wisdom may advise you to not put all your eggs into one basket, there are times–like this one with the SCORE mentoring for me–when putting all your eggs into one basket will be the smartest move you’ll ever make.

Do it! I know you can! I’m here to let you know I believe in you!

If you need a boost, write in the comments section below and I’ll formulate a pep talk just for you!

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

PS:  SCORE is a national organization; check out their website to find your state and local chapters: http://www.score.org. They offer one-on-one mentoring as well as in-person seminars and workshops–often in collaboration with local libraries and chambers of commerce–and they also offer web-based seminars and workshops. And it’s all FREE!

Quotes to Help You Make a Great Week

Copyright 2015 Artisans Workshop Designs
Copyright 2015 Artisans Workshop Designs

 

Keep these quotes in mind to help you stay the course as you go through your week.

 

Patience and perseverance have a magical effect, before which difficulties and obstacles vanish.  ~John Quincy Adams, Sixth President of the United States

 

You may be over-thinking it. Just take the next best step–or bit of a step.  ~Unknown

 

Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not.  Nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent.  Education will not.  The world is full of educated derelicts.  Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.  ~Calvin Coolidge, Thirtieth President of the United States

 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Don%27t_be_Afraid_to_be_Amazing.JPG
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Don%27t_be_Afraid_to_be_Amazing.JPG

Focus on the dream, not the competition.  ~Unknown

 

To reach a port we must set sail. Sail, not lie at anchor.  Sail, not drift.  ~Oliver Wendell Holmes 

 

If Plan A didn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters!  ~Unknown

 

I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.’  ~Muhammad Ali

 

97% of the people who quit too soon are employed by the 3% that never gave up. ~Unknown

 

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=65126&picture=background-647 & Artisan Workshop Designs
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=65126&picture=background-647 & Artisan Workshop Designs

Action Plan: Make a great week for yourself by taking the next step, or bit of a step.

You can do it!

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Additional Things I’ve Learned About Pressing the Reset Button

https://pixabay.com/en/friends-child-girl-teddy-soft-toy-551903/
https://pixabay.com/en/friends-child-girl-teddy-soft-toy-551903/

I was thinking about yesterday’s post that was inspired by the quote by Aung San Suu Kyi: “if you’re feeling hopeless, help someone.”

It occurred to me that what makes that quote work is to have “skin in the game”, as the pop culture saying goes.  For instance, my mood was lifted when I helped my friend–not a stranger–achieve his goals–locate the areas of his writing that need some shoring up.  This is important to him and, as his friend, it’s then important to me, too.

Same thing for Julie, who commented on yesterday’s post. Her spirits are uplifted when she babysits for her grandson and also when she spends time with and helps her mom. In both these instances, she has plenty of “skin in the game.”

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:FEMA_-_13355_-_Photograph_by_Kevin_Galvin_taken_on_01-01-2004_in_Massachusetts.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:FEMA_-_13355_-_Photograph_by_Kevin_Galvin_taken_on_01-01-2004_in_Massachusetts.jpg

I’m all for performing acts of kindness to all–stranger and friends alike. But it seems to me that the biggest boost–and sustaining the boost–comes from helping people close to us: family, friends, colleagues, and others we know.

Have you tried this and have you found it helpful? Did you tweak it to make it more effective?

Let me know what you think in the comments below!

You’re spectacular!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=24605&picture=colorful-birthday-cake
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=24605&picture=colorful-birthday-cake

PS Happy Birthday to everyone celebrating their special day today!

 

What I’ve Learned About A Bad Day: How to Press the Reset Button

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Repeat_font_awesome.svg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Repeat_font_awesome.svg

 

 

If you’re feeling helpless, help someone. ~Aung San Suu Kyi

 

Today I was totally deflated. It was the fourth time since the beginning of the year that I’ve had to take my laptop into the shop to be fixed.  It’s been doing some strange things such as vaporizing a file with important work in it–vaporizing it to the point where there was no trace of it, even using specialized software to find it.

When I picked up my computer last week, after they told me the sad news that they tried everything to recover the file and just couldn’t, the technician assured me that they thoroughly checked it out and cleaned it up and I shouldn’t have any problems.

For the past few days my computer worked fine.  I was glad to have the problems behind me…or so I thought.

Until this morning when I turned on my laptop to use it and found that Word, Excel, and Powerpoint had mysteriously disappeared.

At first, I thought I just needed to turn off and then turn on my computer.

No luck.

Instead of using the shortcut on the task bar, I tried to find the icons on my desktop.

Not there.

Looked for them in the list of programs.

Not there.

Tried turning off and turning on the computer again.

No help.

That’s when I had to face what I didn’t want to face: there was something seriously wrong with my laptop and it had to go back to the shop.

Again.

I felt like someone let the air out of me just like an old birthday balloon that was once full of bounce and floated near the ceiling and now was dull, slack, and dragged along the floor.

Ugh.

I had a lot on my To Do list and couldn’t afford to mope listlessly about. I thought that giving myself a break for a half hour to just sit with my feelings would help me process and release them.

No help.

Then I thought sitting in the sun would help. Sometimes I find being outside breathing fresh air and absorbing the sun’s warmth into my being can be very soothing and comforting.

No help today.

I tried listening to uplifting music and all that did was annoy me (!!).

Sometimes straightening up my workspace or working on an easy or fun work task helps me shift gears, but no help today.

I didn’t know what the heck to do to get out of my own way and press that reset button!

Turns out, a friend of mine sent me a few pages to critique (we’re in a writing group together). I started working on them and soon I noticed my mood changing.

Finally!

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:2009-05-09R%C3%A4uberleiter0040.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:2009-05-09R%C3%A4uberleiter0040.jpg

That’s when I remembered today’s quote by Aung San Suu Kyi:  If you’re feeling helpless, help someone. 

It helped me and I think it can help you, too.

Action Plan: Keep today’s quote handy–tape it in a place where you’ll see it often.  The next time you have a day where you feel mopey, sad, worried, angry, frightened, or just not yourself, remember to reach out and help somebody!

Let me know in the comments below if you’ve found this quote helpful.  Also, if you know of someone who’s having a bad day or going through a rough patch, feel free to pass along this post.  Thanks!

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Thoughts on Failure from Henry Ford

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Worried_People_1.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Worried_People_1.jpg

 

Failure is only the opportunity more intelligently to begin again. ~Henry Ford

 

I love this quote from Henry Ford because it puts failure in perspective. Failure is not an indictment of your worthiness or capabilities.  It is not a judgment on your intelligence or competency.

Many people we celebrate as geniuses have failed at least once–some people have failed repeatedly before finding their stride.  People such as Einstein, Thomas Edison, the Wright Brothers, Steven Jobs, Brian Tracy, T. Harv Eker, Larry Winget, and many others.

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hot_Air_Balloon_2012_-_2_-_Reach_for_the_Stars.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hot_Air_Balloon_2012_-_2_-_Reach_for_the_Stars.jpg

Action Plan: If you’ve failed and are shaming yourself with it, STOP.  Take an objective look at the situation.  Take judgment, condemnation, and shame out of the mix.  Look at the facts and only the facts of the situation.

Turn the situation over and look at it from the sides, back, top, and bottom. Do you see where it’s weak and can you think of an idea to shore it up?  Do you see where there may be extraneous “stuff” that seemed like a good idea at the time but now you can see that they are unnecessary?

What can you do differently when you have another go at it?

I know you can do this–you do have what it takes!

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss!

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=70956&picture=colourful-gifts-clip-art
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=70956&picture=colourful-gifts-clip-art

 

Like many other children, I grew up reading Dr. Seuss books. I loved the fantastical creatures and language his creative mind conjured.  So much fun!

Today, to celebrate his birthday and the many enjoyable hours we spent reading his books as kids and then reading them to our own kids, let’s let our imaginations go!

https://pixabay.com/en/man-silhouette-pear-light-idea-814697/
https://pixabay.com/en/man-silhouette-pear-light-idea-814697/

Action Plan: Take a moment today to think fantastically.  Think outside the box regarding your dreams.  Think in nonsensical, far-out ways.  Keep a notepad and pencil handy to jot down the “crazy” ideas that come to you.  You may find that one of them–tweaked just a tad–is the key to the next step you’ve been trying to take.

Have fun with this!

Even if you don’t get any ideas you can work with, it’s fun to stretch your imagination–take it out for a spin and see what it can do!

Enjoy!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Day After Leap Day 2016

Copyright 2015 Artisans Workshop Designs
Copyright 2015 Artisans Workshop Designs

 

Welcome to YesICanPepTalks.com!  I’m so glad you’re here!

Gradually, I’ll be making the content and format changes that I told you about in yesterday’s post (click here to be taken to it).  I’m so happy you’re coming along on the ride with me!

Just to let you know, I made the leap to http://www.YesICanPepTalks.com, however, due to some “tech-y stuff”, the domain name is a temporary redirect. We thought we had all the “I’s” dotted and “T’s” crossed but, when we pressed The Button…we got crickets chirping.

Ack!

I’m working with tech support to get everything lined up and then we’ll try the switch-over again.  I’ll keep you informed.

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=82279&picture=clip-art-sun-rays-2
http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/view-image.php?image=82279&picture=clip-art-sun-rays-2

I want to know about you!  What was your Big Leap yesterday and how did it go?  Did you gain any insights into yourself?  Did you have to tweak your original game plan for your Big Leap?

Most of all, what did you do to celebrate your Big Leap? 

Inquiring minds want to know!  🙂   Share your experiences in the comments below.

Even though my Big Leap didn’t go quite as planned (in fact you could say I’m still in mid-leap as we work out the technical issues), the fact that I did leap requires a celebration.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Schabarum_Regional_Park_(Mar_2014)_31.JPG
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Schabarum_Regional_Park_(Mar_2014)_31.JPG

My Big Leap celebration was taking a longer lunch break today. I enjoyed the pretty weather we had by taking a walk.  I also left enough time to indulge in one of my all-time favorite activities, which is watching Mother Nature.  The birds are quite active this year and I find it uplifting to hear them chirping and to watch them hopping on branches, looking for food, searching for nesting materials, and–of course!–I love to watch them flying.

It was a refreshing break and, to me, a great reward for taking the Big Leap.

Instead of “Homework”, we’ll call it an “Action Plan” and here’s your first one: If you haven’t already celebrated your Big Leap, do it now!

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hiker_in_the_top_of_mountain.JPG
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hiker_in_the_top_of_mountain.JPG

And don’t say that you don’t “deserve” to reward yourself because when you compare your Big Leap to everyone else’s it’s more like a microscopically tiny bit of a step.  The size of the Big Leap doesn’t matter.  AND, it doesn’t matter how successful–or not–you were in the results of your Big Leap.

All that matters is that you challenged yourself to do something that was big and scary and then you went for it. 

Celebrate and reward yourself for that, because that, my dear Pep Pal, is what makes you so amazingly AWESOME!!

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sunset_Party_Dancing_Girl_Silhouette.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sunset_Party_Dancing_Girl_Silhouette.jpg

Celebrating/rewarding/applauding yourself is an important action to take. You don’t want to get into the bad habit of either always working and never applauding yourself for the steps you’ve taken and the progress you’ve made, or you don’t want to indefinitely put off rewarding yourself with the promise that later on you’ll do it.

Not rewarding yourself, not recognizing the steps you have taken and the progress you have made is one of the quickest ways to burn out and become demoralized.

This will result in either giving up on your dreams or only half-heartedly pursuing them.

Your dreams are too important!

You can’t give up on them or only give them a “lick and a promise”! 

You were born to achieve them!

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:People_hugging_in_the_beach.jpg
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:People_hugging_in_the_beach.jpg

So, reward yourself today. Do it now!

Let me know in the comments below that you’ve followed through on this Action Plan.

I’m proud of you!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren