I just heard something really cool about affirmations and I knew you’d be blown away by, too.
I just heard an interview by Brendon Burchard, a popular high performance coach, who talked about some of the research he’s concluded on peak achievement. In a small section of the interview he talked about the surprising things he and his research team discovered about affirmations.
In speaking to thousands of high performing international business people and world-class athletes from around the world, Brendon Burchard’s research has debunked another “truth” about affirmations: they must be “I” statements. He and his team concluded that affirmations are more powerful when they are stated in the second or third person, instead of the first person.
For instance, here is a positive statement in the first person: “I am so lucky to be doing work I love. I am honored to be helping others. I feel great when I have a positive impact on others, helping them improve their lives.”
Here is that same statement in the second person: “Brendon, you are so lucky to be doing the work you love. You are so honored to be helping others. You feel great when you have a positive impact on others, helping them improve their lives.”
Here’s the same statement in third person: “Brendon is so luck to be doing work he loves. Brendon is honored to be helping others. He feels great when he has a positive impact on others, helping them improve their lives.”
Which new technique feels more comfortable for you, statements in the second person or in the third person? I think I prefer second person.
I’m going to give this a try and I’ll let you know how it goes. Join me and let me know how it goes for you! Thanks!
Perhaps they are too far down the road. Even though we think we formulated affirmations for just a few steps ahead, perhaps those steps are bigger than we realized and, as a result, our affirmations are trying to push us to take too big of a step or a step we aren’t ready to take. Break your affirmations into little steps.
~Leave some room, some air, in them for Magic.
Perhaps the affirmations we made are too structured, too defined, and there’s no room for unexpected better things to come along. For instance, I have a friend who talks to the Universe and says what she’s striving for and gives what she thinks is the best course of action, but then she says that she’s leaving the actual “how” of it in the Universe’s hands. Sure enough, more often than not, something unexpected usually happens and it’s something she never thought of–and it’s usually better in some way. Give your affirmations some elbow room to work out!
Above all, keep going! Keep taking steps and affirming that everything is working out for you!
Give these two suggestions a try when you hit a rough patch with your affirmations. Let me know how they work out for you. Thanks!
On Wednesday we brainstormed and yesterday we took those ideas and we put aside the practical ones, the responsible ones, the doable ones, which left us with the crazy, outrageous, just totally nuts ideas.
We took some quiet time yesterday to think about these ideas, as crazy as they are and as anxious as they might make us feel. We did this because it’s in the outrageous ideas where our future lies. It’s in following through on these bold ideas–or combinations of these bold ideas–that we’re going to be able to craft our soul-prospering life.
The life you dream of does not come from being practical, being reasonable, being logical. Crafting a soul prospering life, living the life of your dreams, comes from being bold, outrageous, stepping outside your comfort zone, pushing the edge of the envelope, doing what you never thought you’d be able to do, finding your limits and pushing past them.
That’s why these crazy ideas, these totally nuts ideas, are so important.
What were some of the steps that you came up with? Did you take any of them? If not, do something right now, something little. It can be something as simple as sitting quietly and visualizing your dream, what it would be like to live a soul prospering life.
How would you feel about yourself; how would you feel about your prospects and opportunities in the world?
How would going for your soul-prosper in life change you and enhance you make you a bigger, better person?
That’s what a soul prospering life is. It isn’t about having a million dollars in the bank or having a big, fat fancy house or becoming famous and popular. It’s about how the journey helps you grow and develop in ways you never thought possible; how it gives you a deeper, richer, more vibrant and juicy life.
Taking this kind of action is awkward stuff, really…which is why we haven’t done it before now. We DO have to step out of the comfort zone, we DO have to feel uncomfortable, we DO have to be unsure.
We have to learn how to live with not knowing and not being sure but taking action anyway.
Now that we’re talking about feeling awkward and uncomfortable, take a moment to identify exactly what your brand of awkward and uncomfortable is.
Some people feel some form of fear, other people feel sad, others feel depressed about the whole thing, and still others can give up and walk away even before they’ve started.
The fearful people may be driven by the thought that it’s too hard and they think they can’t, or they think they’ll be crushed in some way. Some of them worry that if they try for their dreams, they’ll wind up worse off.
Angry people may feel that they’ll work really hard only to have someone else get the credit and the benefits. Or, they may feel that their success will be taken away from them.
Sad people may think that it’s a long, hard road with only a very small payoff at the end.
People who throw in the towel before they even start may think that it’s work, work, and more work, and in-between times there’ll be obstacles, and difficulties, and even heartbreaks.
If you see yourself in any of these descriptions, don’t worry. Tomorrow we’re going to talk about what you can do about these feelings and thought patterns–how you can stop them before they stop you.
You’re doing GREAT! Come back tomorrow so we can continue our chat.
Today, let’s take a closer look at ALL the ideas we jotted down, NOT leaving out any idea no matter how nutty, crazy, stupid, outlandish, dumb, frivolous, etc., they may seem.
Now, let’s categorize our ideas. We’ll have only two groups (1) Reasonable, (2) Totally NUTS!!. Some ideas may be hard to categorize because they’re not quite reasonable but they aren’t totally nuts either. With these, tune into your instincts and let that help you choose which category to put the idea into.
Take some quiet, uninterrupted time, about 15 – 20 minutes. When you have your Reasonable group and you have your Totally NUTS group, put the Reasonable ideas to the side.
We’re going to focus on the Totally NUTS ideas.
Why? Because THAT’S how you’ll achieve your soul-prospering life!
You won’t achieve the life you yearn for if you are reasonable, rational, logical. This is the thinking that’s keeping you in your comfort zone, stuck in your rut!
It’s when you seriously look at your Totally NUTS ideas that you find your way out of your dead-end, unsatisfying life and step into your soul-prospering life!
Sit quietly without interruptions and think about steps you can take within a day or two regarding your Totally NUTS ideas. I know this is scary stuff, but you don’t have to take giant leaps or enormous bounds. All you have to do is take one tiny little baby step. That’s it!
Hang onto this list of Totally NUTS ideas because we’re going to talk more about them tomorrow.
WooHoo! Exciting stuff! You and me, we’re on our way! WooHoo!
Part of self-mastery is taking care of yourself–your physicality. You need mental, emotional, and physical strength and wherewithal to master yourself. If you are tired and stressed, you’re more apt to take the easy way and knuckle under to your habits.
~Are you getting enough hours of sleep or are you skimping in favor of working later or sitting up at night worrying?
~Is you sleep restful or are you too tense to fully relax into a peaceful sleep?
~Is your sleep restorative or do you wake frequently throughout the night, even if just for a moment?
If you answer yes to any of these questions, take the time to pinpoint what’s going on so you can determine how best to help yourself. Research has shown that sleep is critical to your ongoing health and well-being and skimping on it or having poor quality sleep is very damaging, especially over the long term.
When checking in with yourself, perhaps you discover worry, sadness, or frustrations are bothering you. Ask yourself what you can do to release these so you can get a restful, restorative night’s sleep.
Some suggestions are:
~meditate/pray and connect with God/Source. It’s also great to pray/meditate with someone else because they may be able to pray in a way that your worried, agitated state is preventing you from doing.
~listen to soothing, calming music such as Brahms’ Lullaby, Pachebel’s Canon in D, Satie’s Trois Geyumnopedies, Debussy’s Clair de Lune.
~read uplifting, hopeful passages from inspirational or faith-based writings
~take a warm bath before bedtime.
~Improving your sleep can be something as simple as getting a new pillow, changing the orientation of your bed, opening a window for cool fresh air, adding a light covering so you’re warm enough. Also try changing the style of your pajamas, for instance if you’ve always worn a nightgown, perhaps changing to a pajama set of pants with a matching top.
When you check in with yourself, pay attention to your nutritional habits–what are they?
~Are you eating high quality, nutritious food or do you reach for what’s handy and quick?
~Are you sitting down to have your meals or are you eating on the go?
~Do you focus on enjoying and savoring your food or do you eat at your desk or while watching TV and just shovel in the food, not paying attention to what you’re eating?
~Do you take a moment to make your food attractive and appetizing or do you eat on paper plates or out of the take-out cartons?
~Do you eat in messy or dirty surroundings?
Some suggestions are:
When reviewing your eating and nutrition habits, you might identify areas where you aren’t properly nurturing yourself. The two biggest things you can do to help yourself in this area are (1) to step away from the junk food, prepared foods, convenience foods, and foods high in sugar and preservatives. Instead buy food that is natural and organic. Yes, these foods cost more right now, but the payoff in the future is immense.
Don’t economize on the quality of your food!
(2) When you eat, step away from your desk, turn off the TV, put away all electronics, and concentrate on your meal. Notice the aroma, the texture, the flavors. Eat sitting down in calm and clean surroundings and use real plates and real flatware.
Take your time and savor each mouthful!
~Are you in the rut of sleep-eat-work-sleep-eat-work?
~When was the last time you did something for fun?
~How long has it been since you took time off and just hung out with nothing more to do but relax?
~Have you taken time to enjoy your hobbies?
~Do you regularly spend time with your friends and loved ones?
~Have you developed a regular meditation/contemplation/quiet time practice?
You may feel awkward or guilty getting away from your routine, taking a break and giving yourself breathing room. This is an important part of self-mastery. You can’t get a handle on yourself if you are burned out, a slave to your routines, stuck in a rut, or fed up.
Perhaps your situation right now is such that you don’t have the time or the finances to actually get away, but you can do simple things that will refresh you.
Some suggestions are:
~choose TV programs that are interesting or educational, such as those found on PBS and the science channels–turn off reality TV!
~read a good book–fiction or non-fiction;
~take the scenic route back and forth to work instead of sitting in rush hour traffic;
~pack a picnic lunch and enjoy it in a local park;
~play with your kids, spend time with your spouse or partner; invite friends over for a potluck dinner and a movie.
Incorporate some of these suggestions into your life a little at a time–you don’t have to do these all at once! As you do this, over time you will find you’ll become more in control of yourself and your life.