We’ve all heard that controlling our thoughts is the key to living the life of our dreams–our soul-prospering life. This is true; I can attest to it.
In my current situation, I find myself thrown together with someone who has a very strong personality and is incredibly opinionated. When I’m with these types of people I’m often overwhelmed by the force of their personalities. This current situation is giving me ample opportunity to learn at a deeper level how to control my thoughts.
When I feel overwhelmed it’s because I’m using the world’s judgment, values, and measuring tools to decide whether or not I’m good enough. I’m letting someone else decide my worthiness–or lack of it. I’m forgetting that, just like everyone else, at my core:
~I am good enough.
~I am awesome at being me
~I am valuable
~I am needed
~I am fully loaded with awesome gifts and talents
~I am capable and competent
~I am destined to make my mark
These statements are true about you, too!
Feel free to use the above statements and say them to yourself over and over and over again whenever you feel overwhelmed, intimidated, not good enough, or any other emotion that makes you feel less than. You are much, much more than you realize.
This weekend I listened again to a few talks given by Eckhart Tolle that have been posted on YouTube. His messages made me realize that the biggest reason we may not be living soul-prospering lives is because we think too much!
We should stop thinking!
I don’t mean that we should shuffle along in a catatonic state; we need to realize, though, that our thoughts are generally negative and limiting.
We probably have recognized some of our default thoughts when we’re faced with difficulties or when we confront something new are ones such as:
It’s too hard;
It’s too much;
Ill never be able to learn;
It’s always one problem after another;
Why bother because nothing I do ever makes a difference….
But what about those thoughts that run through our minds that are just below our awareness? While you may not be aware of them, you can tell if they’re positive or negative by how you are feeling.
For instance, if you’re feeling frustrated, tired, worried, sad, anxious, and other feelings along those lines, then we’re probably thinking something along the lines of:
I always get stuck with the awful jobs;
This is too hard for me;
My boss looked at me weird; am I going to get laid off;
It’s only 9:30 am; I can’t wait for this day to be over;
I’ll never make enough money….
What can we do about this, though?
It’s impossible for us to stop thinking and it’s probably unrealistic to think that we can completely eradicate our negative thoughts.
What we can do is to periodically check in with ourselves and notice how we’re feeling. When we find ourselves feeling negative, we should understand that we’ve allowed something to get under our skin and discombobulate us so we’re now feeling sad, angry, worried….
This week we’ll talk more about thinking and how to get a handle on ours. Come back tomorrow for the next installment!
This was originally posted on June 13, 2014, nearly four years ago to the day! The subject matter is still topical and relevant today. Read on and let me know what you think. Thanks!
I am a member of a CSA at a local vegetable farm and this week is the start of the season. Part of the fun of the CSA is the Pick Your Own (PYO) portion of the shares where members are allowed to go into the field and pick for themselves a certain amount of a few selected crops.
I always look forward to this because it gives me an opportunity to open myself to Nature and Its wisdom. This week the PYO portion is strawberries, which explains the title of this post!
When I entered the strawberry patch all I saw around me were rows and rows of green leaves. I was surprised that the farmers were allowing us to pick two quarts because, at first glance, there didn’t seem to be enough strawberries for everyone. As I looked closer, thought, I could see the big juicy berries; everyone would be able to get their full share!
This made me think of ideas and how oftentimes we don’t see the ones that are right at our feet. We think that where we are has absolutely no opportunities for us. We look with longing where others are standing because they seem to be smack-dab in the middle of a juicy strawberry patch of ideas.
However, if we take the time to look carefully—get closer to the plants, gently move aside the leaves—there they are! There are our own ripe, juicy ideas!
Your homework today is to be curious about the patch right where you’re standing. Get closer and see what you can discover. And, since this is the end of the week and the perfect time for a review, look back over the past several days. Were there crazy ideas that you discarded without looking closer at them? While they may not be workable in their raw state, with a little chipping and sanding, and then polishing, they may turn out to be a shortcut to your dreams!
Remember, too, to celebrate the steps you did take this week—no matter how small. They all add up!
Our lives get so busy with tasks, projects, and even with the goals we set for ourselves. We have responsibilities, obligations. People depend on us; we depend upon ourselves. We’re pulled this way and pushed that way.
ACK! What are we supposed to do about it all??!
The answer is Nature. Nature IS nurture! Nature can restore our balance.
We don’t have to travel to exotic locales or far-flung lands to be nurtured by Nature. While it’s wonderful to stroll through a cool forest or walk along a sandy beach, we can still be balanced and restored by a vase of flowers or a “common” houseplant.
When you’re with Nature, whether it’s spending time in a magnificent park or observing the weeds growing alongside the road, take a moment to observe what you are seeing and experiencing.
For instance, look closely at a flower. Notice how it’s put together, the richness of the color, and how its color is made up of different hues and a variety of shadings. Look how velvety the petals are and how they shine and glow in the sunlight.
Immerse yourself in that flower. Observe it deeply it will astonish you. Let it blow your mind and open your soul.
Here are three quotes that can help you get into the right frame of mind:
In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks. ~John Muir
Study nature, love nature, stay close to nature. It will never fail you. ~Frank Lloyd Wright
Time spent amongst trees is never wasted time. ~Katrina Mayer
James Allen states that there are beginnings we have no control over, for instance we may have been laid off from work and now we’re facing the beginning of unemployment and the process of looking for a new job. He advises to not focus on these beginnings, aside from taking care of our responsibilities, but rather to focus on the beginnings we have total and complete control over. He says that these types of beginnings are of vital importance because they create the complex web of results that then make up our life. He went on to say that these beginnings are controlled by our thoughts and mental attitudes, and the resulting daily conduct and actions we take.
According to James Allen, the first beginning to focus on—the easiest one to take control of—is the start of a new day, namely when your alarm clock first rings. He suggests answering these questions because “…much happiness or unhappiness depends upon the right or wrong beginning of the day…”:
~At what time does the alarm go off?
~Do we immediately get up?
~In what frame of mind do we enter the sacredness of a new day?
~How do we go about getting ready for the day?
One of his suggestions is to rise at an early hour, even if we don’t have to because this will help “…start the day strongly by shaking off indolence.”
Then this statement jumped out at me: “…How are you to develop strength of will in mind and body if you begin every day by yielding to weakness?”
He’s telling us to stop hitting the snooze button and to get up when our alarm first goes off.
I get his point that by hitting the snooze alarm, we aren’t really getting a few extra Zzzz’s—in fact researchers have shown that hitting the snooze alarm does not help; the “extra sleep” you get is not restful. James Allen is saying that when we hit the snooze alarm what we’re actually doing is telling our mind and body that it’s okay to procrastinate, it’s okay to indulge ourselves, it’s okay to go for instant gratification.
James Allen goes on to say: “Self-indulgence is always followed by unhappiness. People who lie abed until a late hour are never bright and cheerful and fresh but are the prey of irritabilities, depressions…and all unhappy moods.”
He then goes on to say that hitting the snooze alarm is like an alcoholic taking a nip in order to brace him/herself and steady his/her nerves for the upcoming issues in the day.
It’s our self-indulgence in hitting the snooze alarm that creates indolence and avoidance that is creating the issues–it’s our weaknesses and our pandering to our moods and emotions that are at the root cause of the issues that we’re avoiding!
James Allen adds: :…Men and women are totally unaware of the great losses which they entail by this common indolence (hitting the snooze alarm): loss of strength of both mind and body, loss of prosperity, loss of knowledge, and loss of happiness.
James Allen isn’t the only one who urges getting up early and getting up right away. Earl Nightingale, Brian Tracy, Wayne Dyer and other successful people join him in this. One of James Allen suggestions for this “extra time” is to take a gentle walk in Nature. Earl Nightingale, Brian Tracy, Wayne Dyer, and others advise filling the time with studying sacred and/or inspirational writings, studying the industry in which we work, and pursuing other avenues of self-development and education.
Usually I get up the first time the alarm rings. Occasionally, though, I’ve let myself sleep a little later, commonly on the weekends. I have noticed that James Allen’s statement is true: I seem to be a little less focused and less productive on the days I allow myself to catch up on my sleep. In fact, I had been wondering if it wouldn’t be better to get up at my normal time and take a short nap during the day if I need it. I guess James Allen’s answer would be YES!!!
This week’s challenge is to get up on time—when the alarm first rings. Let me know the differences you notice in your week. Feel free to leave your comments below. Thanks!
Building Block #4 of a solid morning routine is taking care of your body. Think about this building block as having fun with movement rather than thinking about struggling with exercise. And think about taking care of your body by eating delicious food rather than thinking about the yucky diet food you think you should eat.
Sometimes in our minds exercise can be daunting and hard and no fun at all. Movement, on the other hand, can be dancing to your favorite music or taking a walk through your neighborhood and admiring others’ gardens. These activities can be interesting and enjoyable. No need to spend hours on end sweating at the gym!
When we think about nutrition our minds imagine small portions of food that isn’t very filling and that isn’t too tasty either. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Fresh fruit and vegetables are jam-packed full of vitamins and minerals. They’re quick and easy to prepare, making them an ideal grab-and-go food–much better than a donut or pastry. No need to spend hours slaving over a hot stove!
What are some fun activities you can do in the morning to get your body moving? What are your favorite fruits and vegetables?
Building block #3 can go along with this because this one’s all about choosing one or two things you can do today to take you closer to a goal that’s important to you. Not a goal that’s important to your boss or your spouse or kids, but rather a goal that is very important to you.
An example to illustrate how building block #2 and building block #3 can fit nicely together is from my own life. My area of interest is writing and I read books, study other’s writing techniques, take online classes in writing, and I’m a member of a writing group. Currently, each morning I take 15 minutes to work on a lesson from the online writing class I’m taking. This is building block #2.
The goal I have that is important to me is to put together an anthology of my short stories, so each morning I write for 15 minutes, working on a story. This is building block #3. See how building block #2 and building block #3 can fit together? It isn’t essential that they fit but I wanted you to know that they can.
Is there a way that you can fit together building block #2 and building block #3? Think about it and see what you can do.