Tag Archives: Painful

Back by Popular Demand: Sitting in Silence: Creating Space for Peace in Your Life

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Are you starting your day with a few moments of silence? Perhaps you’re ending your day with several minutes of silence. Maybe you start and end your day with a few minutes of silence!

The post below reminds us of one of the wonderful benefits of sitting in silence, even for only a few moments. This post was originally published on October 24, 2016.

 

 

 

 

 

This world is a noisy, crazy–sometimes terrifying–place and it seems as if it’s getting noisier, crazier, and more terrifying by the minute. We’re overwhelmed by it all and, what’s worse, it seems as if there’s no relief coming anytime soon.

This is how Sitting in Silence can help. This practice gives you the opportunity to make much needed space–margin, as it’s called these days–in your life.

To be a vibrant, whole person who’s fully engaged in living life, you need this space. You need space to think, space to feel, space to make sense of things.  You need space to absorb your thoughts and feelings, and assimilate them into your life.  These are the basis of your success and happiness in life.

I urge and encourage you to Sit in Silence every single day. Do it first thing in the morning for fifteen minutes.  Stick with it for a month and see what happens.  I am positive you’ll be pleased with the calmness that will settle into your life.

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

 

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Back by Popular Demand: 10 Quotes for When Fear Has You in Its Clutches

 

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We’ve all been afraid, especially when we’re going after our dreams. Fear seeps into our thoughts not only when we’re outside our comfort zone but even when we’re just thinking about maybe stepping a tiny bit outside, perhaps….

Below are 10 quotes that can boost your spirits and help you take the next step in spite of the fear and terror you may be feeling. The quotes below were originally posted on September 15, 2015.

Enjoy!

 

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”– Dale Carnegie

 

“Most obstacles melt away when we make up our minds to boldly walk through them.” – Orison Swett Marden

 

“It’s all right to be afraid. You just don’t let it stop you from doing your job.”– Jim Butcher

 

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”  – Confucius

 

“We generate fears while we sit. We overcome them by action. Fear is nature’s way of warning us to get busy.” – Dr. Henry Link

 

“Don’t be afraid of your fears. They’re not there to scare you. They’re there to let you know that something is worth it.” – C. JoyBell C.

 

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” – Theodore Roosevelt

 

“I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.” – Rosa Parks

 

“Every day do something that will inch you closer to a better tomorrow.”  – Doug Firebaugh

“Fear isn’t an excuse to come to a standstill. It’s the impetus to step up and strike.” – Arthur Ashe

 

Keep these quotes handy during the week. When you become worried, fearful, or terrified, pull them out. Let their calm wisdom comfort and soothe you.   Then take the next step!

You can do it!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Frenemies: What to Say to Yourself When a Frenemy Attacks

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Have you ever suffered a frenemy attack? Perhaps a colleague at work–someone you’d worked well with previously–throws you under the bus; now it’s you the boss is unfairly zeroing in on. Maybe, in confidence, you told a friend something very personal only to find when the whole group gets together that everyone knows….

After you recover from the shock and embarrassment, what do you say to yourself?

I’m sure you have thoughts of anger and you may even think about revenge how you’ll avenge yourself.. You may feel fear or worried because this may negatively impact your career. You may be sad and disappointed that someone you thought was a friend turned around and betrayed you.

These thoughts and feeling can lead to you telling yourself lies such as:

 

Maybe I am less talented;

 

Maybe I don’t have what it takes to be team leader;

 

Maybe I’ve been deluding myself all along and maybe I truly am an idiot…

 

NONE OF THESE THOUGHTS ARE TRUE!! THEY’RE ALL LIES!!!

 

Here are a few things to tell yourself instead:

 

This says more about them than it does about me;

 

This will show me who my true friends and allies are;

 

I am talented, I am intelligent, I do have a lot on the ball;

 

I am a child of the Universe, no less than the trees and the stars. I have a right to be here. (from the Desiderata by Max Ehrmann)

 

 

Choose on of these thoughts to keep handy–or one that you’ve thought of for yourself. When a frenemy attacks, repeat to yourself the positive statements about yourself.

You can do it!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Frenemies: 7 Quotes for the Upcoming Week

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Last week we started to talk about frenemies. With my computer and Internet troubles, we didn’t finish that discussion so we’ll continue it this week.

Here are 7 quotes about frenemies for this week. Let me know which one(s) ring true for you.

 

Thank you fake friends! You’ve only made me stronger and wiser. ~Unknown

 

Time will prove the worth of friendship. As time goes by we lose the false ones and keep the best. True friends stay when all the rest are gone. ~Ritu Ghatourey

 

Don’t worry about those who talk behind your back. They’re behind you for a reason. ~Unknown

 

An honest enemy is better than a false friend. When in doubt, pay more attention to what people do and less to what they say.   Actions not only speak louder than words, they are more difficult to fake. ~Zero Dean

 

An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind. ~The Buddha

 

A friend who stands with you in pressure is more valuable than a hundred ones who stand with you in pleasure. ~Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

 

Better to have an enemy who slaps you in the face than a friend who stabs you in the back.   ~Unknown

 

Tomorrow we’re going to be talking about handling the feelings you have after being with a frenemy.   Come back and join the conversation!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Frenemies: 7 Quotes for This Week

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I’ve noticed that lately many people have gone into the archives of Yes I Can Pep Talks post and searched form my posts on frenemies.

This week, we’ll talk more about that because we all have frenemies in our lives. Some of them are easy to deal with because we either have limited contact with them or we know that these people are very unhappy and bitter. Usually we can quickly and easily shake off their words.

But that isn’t true of all the frenemies in our lives.

It’s the frenemies we work with, the frenemies in the clubs and organizations we belong to, the frenemies in our circle of friends, and the frenemies in our families that give us the most trouble. Let’s talk about this category of frenemies this week. We can help each other with tips and techniques we’ve found to be helpful in dealing with these people.

Today, here are a few quotes that we can keep in mind this week as we have dealings with the frenemies in our lives.

 

Betrayal is one of the most valuable lessons Life can teach. ~Shania Twain

 

Sweetie, if you’re going to be tow faced, at least make one of them pretty. ~Marilyn Monroe

 

When you talk about me, it says more about you. ~Joe Biden

 

You got nothing to lose. You don’t lose when you lose fake friends. ~Joan Jett

 

It’s better to be alone than to have a fake friend. ~Ann Palacioa

 

Fire false friends. The are in to fast-forward you fall and failure. ~Israelmore Ayivor

 

Some people will pretend to care jus so they can get a better seat to watch your struggle. Every helping hand isn’t always there to help. ~Unknown

 

Which quote(s) rang true for you? Keep it handy this week and refer to it often. It’ll help you press the reset button after you’ve had dealings with your frenemy.

You’re awesome!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

 

 

 

Opportunity by Walter Malone

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The world would have us believe that opportunities are rare and that if we don’t grab them when they come along, not only are they gone forever but there may not be other ones coming our way any time soon.

I like this poem because it tells us that the sentiment stated above is not true–not at all.   While certain opportunities may pass us by and be gone forever, each day brings with it not only a clean slate, but also a whole slew of new opportunities.

Enjoy the poem then afterward, in the comments section, let me know what you thought of it. Enjoy!

 

Opportunity

by Walter Malone

 

They do me wrong who say I come no more

When once I knock and fail to find you in;

For every day I stand outside your door

And bid you wake and rise to fight and win.

 

Wail not for precious chances passed away!

Weep not for golden ages on the wane!

Each night I burn the records of the day;

At sunrise every soul is born again.

 

Laugh like a boy at splendors that have sped;

To vanished joys be blind and deaf and dumb;

My judgments seal the dead past with its dead,

But never bind a moment yet to come.

 

Though deep in mire, wring not your hands and weep;

I lend an arm to all who say: “I can!”

No shamefac’d outcast ever sand so deep

But yet might rise and be again a man.

 

Dost thou behold thy lost youth all aghast?

Dost reel from righteous retribution’s blow?

Then turn from blotted archives of the past

And find the future’s pages white as snow!

 

Art thou a mourner?   Rouse thee from thy spell;

Art thou a sinner?   Sins may be forgiven!

Each morning gives thee wings to flee from hell;

Each night a star to guide thy feet to Heaven.

 

Let me know what you think!   Thanks!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren

Thinking: How to Live a Soul-Prospering Life: Stop Thinking!

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This weekend I listened again to a few talks given by Eckhart Tolle that have been posted on YouTube. His messages made me realize that the biggest reason we may not be living soul-prospering lives is because we think too much!

We should stop thinking!

I don’t mean that we should shuffle along in a catatonic state; we need to realize, though, that our thoughts are generally negative and limiting.

We probably have recognized some of our default thoughts when we’re faced with difficulties or when we confront something new are ones such as:

 

I can’t;

 

It’s too hard;

 

It’s too much;

 

Ill never be able to learn;

 

It’s always one problem after another;

 

Why bother because nothing I do ever makes a difference….

 

But what about those thoughts that run through our minds that are just below our awareness?   While you may not be aware of them, you can tell if they’re positive or negative by how you are feeling.

For instance, if you’re feeling frustrated, tired, worried, sad, anxious, and other feelings along those lines, then we’re probably thinking something along the lines of:

 

I always get stuck with the awful jobs;

 

This is too hard for me;

 

My boss looked at me weird; am I going to get laid off;

 

It’s only 9:30 am; I can’t wait for this day to be over;

 

I’ll never make enough money….

 

What can we do about this, though?

 

It’s impossible for us to stop thinking and it’s probably unrealistic to think that we can completely eradicate our negative thoughts.

What we can do is to periodically check in with ourselves and notice how we’re feeling. When we find ourselves feeling negative, we should understand that we’ve allowed something to get under our skin and discombobulate us so we’re now feeling sad, angry, worried….

This week we’ll talk more about thinking and how to get a handle on ours. Come back tomorrow for the next installment!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Lauren