Tag Archives: stuck

Inspiring Quotes: 6 to Help You Grieve



As part of loss, we grieve.   Grief is the feelings that are inside of us.

We can feel silly grieving if it doesn’t involve the loss of a loved one. We may think that we should buck up, keep a stiff upper lip, and that we should carry on as if nothing happened.

But the loss of a job–even one we hated–or the break-up of a marriage, or any other transition–even ones we’ve longed for such as finally getting out on your own or finally retiring–can trigger grief.

It is perfectly normal to grieve your loss. Here are a few quotes to help you through:

The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing, and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. ~Henri J.M. Nouwen


I remember my aunt telling me however I chose to handle this would be the right way.   There isn’t a handbook or a script.   You just take it as it comes, one day at a time. ~Kayla


Loss and heartache do not define you. They are only one part of your story. ~Unknown


The deeper that sorrow cares into your being the more joy you can contain. Is not the up that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter’s oven? ~Kahlil Gibran


The darker the night, the brighter the stars; the deeper the grief, the closer is God!   ~Fyodor Dostoyevsky


What feels like the end is often a new beginning. ~Unknown


A reminder: when you are dealing with a grief, reach out to others.   Counselors, religious leaders, and other professionals are trained to help. Also, friends and loved ones can offer comfort and support.

Your Friend and Pep Pal,



Inspiring Quotes: 6 to Help with Loss



Sometimes, no matter how much experience we have or how talented and gifted we are or how strongly we believe in our Vision, things don’t go our way; a door closes…permanently.


We must come to terms with it. Here are 6 quotes to help us do this:

Believe me, every heart has its secret sorrows, which the world knows not, and oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad. –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Hyperion


Look for the gift.   Every experience–even the difficult ones–holds a gift. The gift isn’t found wrapped in pretty paper with a sparkly bow; instead, you find it wrapped within your heartache and sadness. Go ahead. Unwrap it.   It’ll be one of the best gifts you’ve ever received. ~Unknown


The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of those depths.   ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross


Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in my perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have–life itself. ~Walter Anderson


When you lose something in your life, stop thinking it’s a loss for you. It is a gift you have been give so you can get on the right path to where you are meant to go, not to where you think you should have gone. ~Suze Orman


When you go through hell, your own personal hell, and you have lost–loss of fame, loss of money, loss of career, loss of family, loss of love, loss of your own identity–and you’ve been able to face the demons that have haunted you, then you learn to appreciate everything that you still do have. ~David Cassidy


A reminder: when you are dealing with a loss, reach out to others.   Counselors, religious leaders, and other professionals are trained to help in these situations. Also, friends and loved ones can offer a shoulder to cry on, a sympathetic ear to listen, and a warm hand to hold.

Your Friend and Pep Pal,



Self-Encouragement: Benefits



You may be thinking that you have a supportive group around you: trusted friends, loved ones, great mentors and teachers, and a network of encouraging colleagues to whom you can turn. You’ve hit rough patches before and you had no trouble finding sympathetic and helpful people. That’s fantastic and I’m very glad you have that.


I challenge you, though, to learn to encourage yourself.


If you realize how to do this for yourself, you will develop invaluable abilities and benefits:   you’ll deepen your self-confidence; you’ll develop potent stick-to-it-ive-ness; you’ll build vigorous resilience. You’ll know you can depend upon yourself to figure “it” out and to pull yourself up.

An additional benefit is that your encouragement will be tailor made just for you–you’ll know just how to motivate yourself and exactly what will sustain that energy.   You won’t have to tweak a system to sorta, kinda, hopefully get it to work for you. It’ll work 100% of the time because YOU are the one who crafted it!

Take time each day this week to note things that lift your spirits, that urge you onward when you’d rather quit, and the things that make all the time and all the effort “sooooo worth it”. Jot them down and keep them handy for when you need a boost.

You can do it!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,


Self-Forgiveness: A Few Insights



Not forgiving ourselves keeps us chained to the past.

By keeping our focus on the past we think that somehow this will make up for or change the past. It won’t. Nothing we can say or do or think will change what happened.


Not forgiving ourselves punishes us over and over and over again.

Perhaps we’re punishing ourselves so that no one else will, because they won’t have to because we’ve already punished ourselves and are continuing to punish ourselves for good measure. That’s convoluted thinking but it makes good sense to those of us who continue to harbor unforgiveness toward ourselves.

Even so, it still doesn’t change the past or what happened.


Not forgiving ourselves doesn’t solve any problems.

Unforgiveness creates more problems in the form of anger issues, depression, stress related illnesses, and living a life way below our potential.


Not forgiving ourselves is NOT the way we’ll craft soul-prospering lives.

The only way to do this is through self-forgiveness, living in the present, and looking to the future.


Tomorrow we’ll talk about a few techniques for forgiving yourself. Be sure to check back in. Thanks!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,


Self-Forgiveness: A Deeper Dive



I came across an excellent article on self-forgiveness as a critical component of healing guilt and shame.  I found it on Psychology Today’s blog.    It’s a bit of a lengthy read, but if you’re struggling with guilt, shame, and blame (or if you know someone who’s grappling with these) this article is well worth it.

The article talks about:

~The devastating effects of guilt, shame, and not forgiving yourself;

~An explanation of the difference between guilt and shame;

~Obstacles to self-forgiveness;

~Forgiving yourself when you’ve harmed others.


The article takes a closer look at four avenues of self-forgiveness:


~Common humanity;

~Earning forgiveness;

~Asking for forgiveness from Source.


My takeaway from this article was the discussion on forgiving yourself when you’ve caused harm to another.  When people talk about forgiveness, usually it’s from the vantage point of having been harmed by someone.  This is the first article that I’ve found that openly discusses how to forgive  yourself when you’ve been the perpetrator of the harm.

What insights did you get from the article?  Let me know in the comments below.  Thanks!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Self-Forgiveness: Why We Don’t



I read an article in Psychology Today regarding self-forgiveness.  Point #2 stood out to me.
Sometimes we allow ourselves to be defined by something that happened to us.  If we forgive the others involved and forgive ourselves, and let it go…then who are we?
We no longer have that injustice to tell us who we are.  We no longer have our outrage or indignation to fuel us, to help us get out of bed in the morning.  We also don’t have it as an excuse of why we aren’t going for our dreams and why we have a life of ‘less than’.
Forgiving others and forgiving ourselves oftentimes requires redefining who we are.  This is best accomplished by not looking  backward to our past and the injustice, but rather facing forward and looking to the present and the future, and all the Goodness that awaits us there.
You can do it, I know you can!
Your Friend and Pep Pal,

Self-Forgiveness: Why Forgiveness, Including Self-Forgiveness, is Important




We all know forgiveness is important, but it’s so hard to do!  As a result, we don’t actively work on forgiving and letting go.  We don’t realize the terrible toll it’s taking on us and how it’s hampering our efforts of crafting a soul-prospering life.

Here’s a sampling of what you can look forward to if you have trouble forgiving, whether it’s forgiving others or yourself:

Impatience and frustration

Fits of anger

Difficulty getting along with others

Rigid personality

Being judgmental


Blame, guilt, shame

Sadness or being in a ‘blue funk’


Negative thinking

Living a life of ‘less than’


Fixated on the past

Fatigue and lethargy




A sampling of the benefits of forgiving yourself and others:

Peace of mind, body, and spirit


Forward looking

Feelings of connectedness

Willingness to give the benefit of the doubt

No longer a prisoner of guilt, shame, and blame


Resiliency and perseverance





Scary, huh?  We’ll talk more about this tomorrow, including how you can move forward on this.

Thanks for reading and following my blog.  If you aren’t receiving these daily messages in your email then please sign up!  You’ll find the ‘subscribe’ button on the upper portion of the left hand column.  Thanks!

Your Friend and Pep Pal,