It is not enough to begin; continuance is necessary. Success depends upon staying power. The reason for failure in most cases is lack of perseverance. ~ Miller
Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. ~ Thomas A. Edison
Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out they’ve got a second. ~ William James
All of us have bad luck and good luck. The man who persists through the bad luck – who keeps right on going – is the man who is there when the good luck comes – and is ready to receive it.~ Robert Collier
Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. – Thomas Edison
If you are going through hell, keep going. ~ Winston Churchill
Your homework today is to earmark time in your upcoming week where you can take the next step.
We’re all busy and our time is over-committed. With that in mind, make sure you break the steps into teensy-tiny, itsy-bitsy pieces that are so small that they can easily fit into the little smidgens of free time in your schedule. Then do those bits and smidgens!
This world is a noisy, crazy–sometimes terrifying–place and it seems as if it’s getting noisier, crazier, and more terrifying by the minute. We’re overwhelmed by it all and, what’s worse, it seems as if there’s no relief coming anytime soon.
This is how Sitting in Silence can help. This practice gives you the opportunity to make much needed space–margin, as it’s called these days–in your life.
To be a vibrant, whole person who’s fully engaged in living life, you need this space. You need space to think, space to feel, space to make sense of things. You need space to absorb your thoughts and feelings, and assimilate them into your life. These are the basis of your success and happiness in life.
I urge and encourage you to Sit in Silence every single day. Do it first thing in the morning for fifteen minutes. Stick with it for a month and see what happens. I am positive you’ll be pleased with the calmness that will settle into your life.
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson.
This is excellent advice. Reviewing your day to look for ways to improve is one thing but going over your day and agonizing over it does no good whatsoever.
Berating yourself over the day does not turn back the clock and give you a second chance at it. It doesn’t erase what you did or did not do. The only thing agonizing and berating does is punish and torture you.
Where’s the good in that? There isn’t any–it doesn’t uplift you.
How does that help you move forward? It doesn’t.
How can you tell the difference between a healthy review of your day and agonizing over the day? With a healthy review, once you are finished, you put it aside and forget about it. When you are agonizing, you don’t put it aside. You keep poking at it, stirring it up, and you can’t leave it alone. It stays with you for hours–sometimes even through the night, disturbing your rest.
In order to train yourself to let the day go, post this quote on your bathroom mirror. As you’re washing up and getting ready for bed, read it and think about it. Let it’s simple wisdom loosen your grip on the day.
We’ve all been afraid, especially when we’re going after our dreams. Fear seeps into our thoughts not only when we’re outside our comfort zone but even when we’re just thinking about maybe stepping a tiny bit outside, perhaps….
Here are 7 quotes about frenemies for this week. Let me know which one(s) ring true for you.
Thank you fake friends! You’ve only made me stronger and wiser. ~Unknown
Time will prove the worth of friendship. As time goes by we lose the false ones and keep the best. True friends stay when all the rest are gone. ~Ritu Ghatourey
Don’t worry about those who talk behind your back. They’re behind you for a reason. ~Unknown
An honest enemy is better than a false friend. When in doubt, pay more attention to what people do and less to what they say. Actions not only speak louder than words, they are more difficult to fake. ~Zero Dean
An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind. ~The Buddha
A friend who stands with you in pressure is more valuable than a hundred ones who stand with you in pleasure. ~Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Better to have an enemy who slaps you in the face than a friend who stabs you in the back. ~Unknown
Tomorrow we’re going to be talking about handling the feelings you have after being with a frenemy. Come back and join the conversation!
Scientists have shown that meditating is good for you. A regular practice can help to lower blood pressure, fight insomnia and lead to a better night’s sleep, among other things.
Another thing meditation can do is to help us calm down and press the reset button after an attack by a frenemy.
No, you don’t have to twist yourself into an uncomfortable position and hold it forever; no, you don’t have to chant or “ohm”. All you need to do is to sit quietly and tune into the serene part of yourself.
Focus on that part of yourself that’s timeless and limitless. Doing this can help to put the situation and the frenemy in perspective. In doing this you’ll see that your frenemy is someone to be pitied, rather than punched. It’s a sad, insecure person who’s worried about their prospects in the future who tends to be a frenemy. People who are creating a soul-prospering life tend to be authentic, helpful, and optimistic.
Also, when you go within, you’ll be reminded of your talents, gifts, and the soul-prospering life you’re crafting for yourself!
Frenemy is someone who acts like a friend–they’re nice to you and they seem to cheer you on to your goals–but in subtle or even overt ways, they sabotage you. They can make you feel bad about yourself and cause you to second-guess yourself. They may take credit for the work you’ve done and they may gossip about you behind your back.
Frenemies have been around for a while. Both Cicero and Benjamin Franklin cautioned their peers about false friends–frenemies.
Sometimes frenemies are easy to spot and easy to steer clear of. They’re obviously unhappy and nasty people and you naturally shy away from them.
But sometimes they’re close to us and we don’t always recognize them for who they truly are. It could be that we work with them, or they’re in our circle of friends, or we may be related to them.
How do you deal with these people, the ones we have no choice but to live and work with?
~If you can’t eliminated your contact with them, limit it as much as you can.
Remember that it’s better to be alone for a while rather than spending time with a person who doesn’t celebrate you. It’s a big wide world out there and you’ll soon meet others who will be a true friend to you.
~Consider having a private conversation with the person.
They may not be aware of their behavior and how it’s impacting your relationship. This can be a good strategy with people with whom you’ve had a great relationship before but lately you’ve felt picked on by them. Perhaps something has changed–you’ve gotten a promotion or your dream is starting to come true–and they feel unsure if you still value them.
Even if the talk doesn’t go well, it can be an opportunity to set some ground rules and establish clear boundaries.
~Take a look at your own self-confidence. Perhaps they’re getting to you because you feel insecure or inadequate.
What areas are you feeling unsure of yourself when your frenemy is present? What can you do to increase your confidence?
~Perhaps you’ve taken your eye off your game plan and it’s a reminder to refocus.
Forget about “keeping up with the Joneses because there’s always going to be someone smarter, younger, cuter, fitter, richer, etc., than you. And trying to keep up with the Joneses can put you in contact with shallow materialistic people who tend to be frenemies.
The next tip is the one I’ve found to be most effective:
~Be cheerful, kind, and compassionate.
It might be too much to ask to behave this way immediately with your frenemy but you can behave pleasantly and with courtesy with the people around you. Not only will you strengthen your friendships with others but then when your frenemy talks behind your back, they’ll be shown to be the jerk, not you.
To sum up, the best ways to deal with frenemies are:
Steer clear of them or limit your contact with them;
I’ve noticed that lately many people have gone into the archives of Yes I Can Pep Talks post and searched form my posts on frenemies.
This week, we’ll talk more about that because we all have frenemies in our lives. Some of them are easy to deal with because we either have limited contact with them or we know that these people are very unhappy and bitter. Usually we can quickly and easily shake off their words.
But that isn’t true of all the frenemies in our lives.
It’s the frenemies we work with, the frenemies in the clubs and organizations we belong to, the frenemies in our circle of friends, and the frenemies in our families that give us the most trouble. Let’s talk about this category of frenemies this week. We can help each other with tips and techniques we’ve found to be helpful in dealing with these people.
Today, here are a few quotes that we can keep in mind this week as we have dealings with the frenemies in our lives.
Betrayal is one of the most valuable lessons Life can teach. ~Shania Twain
Sweetie, if you’re going to be tow faced, at least make one of them pretty. ~Marilyn Monroe
When you talk about me, it says more about you. ~Joe Biden
You got nothing to lose. You don’t lose when you lose fake friends. ~Joan Jett
It’s better to be alone than to have a fake friend. ~Ann Palacioa
Fire false friends. The are in to fast-forward you fall and failure. ~Israelmore Ayivor
Some people will pretend to care jus so they can get a better seat to watch your struggle. Every helping hand isn’t always there to help. ~Unknown
Which quote(s) rang true for you? Keep it handy this week and refer to it often. It’ll help you press the reset button after you’ve had dealings with your frenemy.
The world would have us believe that opportunities are rare and that if we don’t grab them when they come along, not only are they gone forever but there may not be other ones coming our way any time soon.
I like this poem because it tells us that the sentiment stated above is not true–not at all. While certain opportunities may pass us by and be gone forever, each day brings with it not only a clean slate, but also a whole slew of new opportunities.
Enjoy the poem then afterward, in the comments section, let me know what you thought of it. Enjoy!
by Walter Malone
They do me wrong who say I come no more
When once I knock and fail to find you in;
For every day I stand outside your door
And bid you wake and rise to fight and win.
Wail not for precious chances passed away!
Weep not for golden ages on the wane!
Each night I burn the records of the day;
At sunrise every soul is born again.
Laugh like a boy at splendors that have sped;
To vanished joys be blind and deaf and dumb;
My judgments seal the dead past with its dead,
But never bind a moment yet to come.
Though deep in mire, wring not your hands and weep;